Dec
27
Posted: 12.27.10 @ 10:50pm • Filed: Daily Kate • Tags: holiday
Despite all of the family drama, I had an amazing Christmas. I enjoyed spending time with my family and spending my first Christmas with Grayson. I was overjoyed that he got to spend Christmas Eve and the morning of Christmas Day with us. Not only that, it also snowed which is a rarity for where I live. In fact, the ground is still covered in blankets of white even though it has not snowed in three days. My mom mentioned something about an old wives’ tale that talks about if the first good snow stays on the ground for more than three days, a new snow will come to top it. I sure hope so because snow is so pretty. I will most definitely have to post pictures of the snow soon when I bring momma’s camera back and copy her pictures onto my computer.
Christmas was definitely interesting in this house. We spent Christmas Eve at my aunt’s eating dinner and then came back to momma’s to let my niece and nephews open gifts as well as Gray and my siblings. Grayson decided he did not want to play with his baby toys but wanted to overtake my nephew, Riley’s, gift. Riley got a lego castle that you have to build and it came complete with a catapult and a cannon ball which Gray thought the cannon ball was his. After my brother got the cannon ball back from Gray, he then decided he wanted to pick the “cheese” of of my other nephew’s U-Build Mousetrap game. Needless to say after that, my brother decided he would hold Gray and then Gray fell asleep. I have never seen him just lay in someone’s arms like that. He looked so adorable being rocked by my older brother since that is a side my older brother rarely shows to people. Gray definitely loves his Uncle Bubba now.
Since Gray went to bed so easy, I should have figured that meant he would not sleep all the way through the night which he did not do. After Beth and I wrapped gifts while watching True Blood, Gray woke up and then would not go back to bed. He was so hyper and kept trying to watch my sister’s television. He slept with Beth that night even though he only fell back asleep for about two more hours. I am sure you can imagine that Beth and I slept the whole night after Gray left and presents were opened. Everyone loved all of their gifts and I am thankful for everything I received. I do not think we could have asked for a better Christmas!
Due to the cold weather and snow, I am now coming down with a cold. I stopped by the store on my way home tonight to grab me some Theraflu but the store was all out. I then looked for Nyquil and grabbed it but once I got home I noticed I got Dayquil instead of Nyquil! Man, I am a blonde, I swear. Hopefully it will still take away my cold symptoms and I can fall asleep. Speaking of which, I think I will retire to bed and finish reading the last House of Night series book on my phone and then head to bed. I am in love with this series of books and have finished four books in the past week! I am just a little addicted, ha. Since I downloaded an e-reader on my phone, I have done a lot more reading lately. I cannot wait to get my Kindle soon! I have missed reading so much and never realized how much until I started back reading! Anyways, until next time, later love!
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Dec
24
Wow, I have never seen a kid giggle so much in my life as Grayson opened presents at my dad’s earlier. This kid is not only spoiled, but he is so precious. My dad and step-mom got Grayson this Thomas the Train toy that you can flip over and then put it on the ground and it automatically rolls away. He is in love with this toy. I am so excited for tonight when he opens the rest of his gifts!
I wish there was more I could blog but honestly everything else in my life I do not feel like talking about on here. I am down in the dumps and have been for the past week and a half. The stuff with my cousin is causing a rift in my family and now my brother is not even going to my aunt’s for Christmas dinner tonight. To go along with family drama, I have been very sick to my stomach and have been very tired as well as had sore breasts. All of this led my mom and husband to be convinced I am pregnant. I did not even want to consider this because I knew I would be let down but after them saying it over and over, I got my hopes up. When I took the test, I am sure you can tell that it was negative which has caused me to be even more upset. I am frustrated with my body and it makes me feel like less of a woman as crazy as that sounds. I am married and happy and why can the next step not hurry up and get here? I know I need to lose weight first and know that it is better for me and my future children that I am not pregnant right now since I would be high risk but it does not hurt any less.
I just have a lot of feelings and emotions to deal with and would rather just leave it like that. For some reason the winter makes me super depressed and I do not know what to do to change the situation. I am just going to plaster a smile on my face and try to get through today. Sorry to cut things short but it is time to head on over to my aunt’s and then back to my mom’s for Christmas with my siblings and nieces and nephews!
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Dec
18
Christmas is supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year yet so many people show their true colors around this spiritual holiday. Christmas is supposed to be the time of the year where you help our your neighbor and spread love and joy throughout yet most people take it to be the time of the year where you one up your neighbor and spread your bah-humbug spirit. Is it me or have people completely lost the true meaning of Christmas? This is the season for miracles, people! Anything can happen and instead of focusing on spreading love and cheer all most people are focused on is purchasing the perfect gift and making sure they get it before someone else they know. I just do not understand this type of thinking. I have always cherished my family year round but this time of the year was when my grandma loved to bring us even closer. Unfortunately, she is gone now and my family is slowly falling apart. I have seen a member of my family totally do my mom dirty and I honestly never thought they would do that to my mom.
Read more…
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Dec
17
Posted: 12.17.10 @ 11:34pm • Filed: Daily Kate • Tags: #reverb10
I feel pretty horrible right now. My body aches and my face is killing me from where my sinuses are inflamed. Since I have not really been online, I figured I would catch up on #reverb10.
December 13 – Action
When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?
Since I aspire to start a family of my own, my first step is to start losing weight. I know that losing weight is going to be a very difficult struggle, but I know I can do it. My reason to lose overwhelms the wants to eat the foods that are not healthy for me. In fact, I have been cutting back on junk food which has resulted in the jeans I bought before going to Apple Festival that would not even zip, now fit. I was so stoked when I put them on today and wore them. Believe it or not, they actually were a little lose as well. So the action I plan on taking to achieving my aspirations is to continue my weight loss journey.
December 14 – Appreciate
What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?
The one thing I have come to appreciate the most in this past year is my family and my husband. I have learned that life is short and you should enjoy and appreciate the things and people you have in your life now because they will not always be around. After my grandma’s death, I learned to appreciate people even more. I consciously make a daily effort to tell my family and hubby how much I love them and how I appreciate the things they do for me. I have really been working hard on not letting my mouth override my emotions since I have a bad habit of popping off at the mouth without thinking of the consequences the things I say have on others. The one thing I regret is the fact that I have said a lot of hurtful things to my husband in the heat of an argument and those are things I cannot take back. I know I have hurt his feelings big time which is why I have made the effort to become a better person. I have to keep a check on the things I say because my number one weapon when I get hurt or angry is my mouth. I am trying to show my family and husband that I appreciate them so that is why I have been working hard to show them that.
December 15 – 5 Minutes
Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010.
I definitely do not want to forgot my wedding day. That was one of the most important moments of 2010. That and all of my memories of my family and my first meeting with Grayson are the things I do not want to forget. I also do not want to forget the struggles I have had with school this year because that will make the payoff of graduation that much sweeter.
December 16 – Friendship
How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?
My best friends, Jonathan and Beth, have definitely taught me that it is okay to trust others. This has completely changed my perspective of the world since I have lived so long being afraid to trust anyone. Jonathan repaired my faith in men by showing me that a man can not only love you wholeheartedly but they can be there for you as well. I have never had a man fully be there for me and make me feel so secure in our relationship. He is my husband, yes, but more than that he is my best friend. My sister, Beth, has also shown me that people do not always run away like I have seen done repeatedly in my past. My best friends have restored my faith in humanity and for that I will always be grateful.
December 17 – Lesson Learned
What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?
The best thing I have learned is that I am a person of worth. I have lived my life for so long assuming I did not deserve the good things in life. I had no self esteem and I literally cringed every time I looked into the mirror. This year I have learned to love myself and I am happy to say, I am finally at a good place in my life. I now know that I should never accept anything that is less than what I deserve since I have spent so long hanging on to people that were not worth hanging on to just because I assumed that was the best I could do. I have self worth and not only that, I am a beautiful and sweet person. I am also generally a good person and I deserve a lot out of life. I believe the lesson of having self worth is one of the hardest to learn and I hope I can apply that to 2011. I do not want to fall back on my old ways.
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Dec
12
Posted: 12.12.10 @ 11:47pm • Filed: Daily Kate • Tags: #reverb10
Here I am playing catch up yet again thanks to my body feeling under the weather. Yesterday was Selena’s birthday so Selena and Beth spent the night with me since the hubby was helping his cousin work on his truck and stayed over. Grayson definitely enjoyed it being all women in the household aside from him. That kid is quite the flirt these days. We all woke up this morning to snow flurries! We were so excited and it actually came down pretty hard. Since I had to get out in the cold, Grayson and I both have ran fevers this evening. He is in bed already and I am catching up on #reverb10 and other blogging things before I head to bed myself.
December 11 – 11 Things
What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life?
- Stress. I tend to stress the little things in life instead of embracing them. In 2011, I vow to not stress the small things or the things that I cannot change. Instead, I plan to embrace them and accept them wholeheartedly. Doing without stress would change my life in the way that I will not feel so bogged down by everything and will be a lot happier thus making those around me happier as well.
- Soda. One of my goals for 2011 is to do without soda. I have learned that if you cut out a soda a day, you can lose 20 pounds in one year by doing so. Hmm, if I cut out all the soda I am sure I can lose even more than that! Doing without soda will help me lose weight and make me feel a lot better.
- Procrastination. One thing that leads to my added stress is the fact that I am a huge procrastinator. Instead of waiting until the last minute, I vow to do things on time and sometimes even early. This will definitely do away with a lot of stress. If I were to stop procrastinating, my life would change in the fact that I would have more time to do other things and would not be running around last minute like a chicken with its head cut off.
- Fast Food. The hubby and I have been relying on fast food at times since it is a lot easier for us to go get something than to cook at home. This has added to our weight problems. By cutting out the fast food, we will be instilling the importance of family meals to Grayson as well as loosing weight and saving money.
- Random Boxes of Junk. Since we moved, we have random boxes of junk that we have decided to put off going through. In 2011, I plan on downsizing our belongings. I mean seriously, if we can keep junk in a box for three months and not worry about what we are missing, I think that says a lot. It is time to get rid of the junk so we have a nicer, cleaner, clutter-free home.
- Queen of Negativity. I seriously have become the Queen of Negativity this year and it is time to kick that bitch to the curb. I am tired of focusing on the negative and being a Debbie Downer all of the time. In 2011, I plan on focusing on the positives and being thankful instead of ungrateful for the benefit of myself as well as my family. Let’s face it, I am sure my family does not enjoy hearing my negativity all of the time.
- Excess Spending. The hubby and I have been discussing the need to get our finances in order. We have done quite a lot of excess spending in 2010 and plan on stopping that. We plan on living by a budget and putting money away for rainy days as well as to get our own house soon. By changing this habit, we will be much closer to owning our own home.
- Laziness. I have seriously let myself go when it comes to working out and getting things done. I need to stop being so lazy and get things done. I focus on so much things at once that I let the things I can control, such as my amount of exercise and cleaning our house, fall through the cracks. I need to find motivation and get my butt off of the couch no matter how tired or overwhelmed I get. By stopping the whole laziness act, I will get things accomplished which will also take away a lot of the stress I have on me.
- Net Addiction. I have found myself addicted to the net at times even though it is my happy place. I know that by cutting back on my net time, I can accomplish a lot of other things. I also will be able to spend more time with my family as well.
- Verbal Comebacks. One of my craptastic attitude side effects is the constant arsenal of verbal comebacks I have whenever someone says something to me. These I can definitely do without in 2011. I do not want to be the bitchy girl. Instead I plan on working on letting things roll off my back and not get to me. I know by changing this, I will not hurt the feelings of those around me and will not have the onset of feeling bad over the things I say afterward.
- Lack of Meds. One thing I absolutely refuse to allow to go into 2011 is the times I have had lack of medicine. I need my medicine to live and from time to time I will forget to take my medicine which results in harsh side effects where my whole body feels like I have been hit my a MAC truck and I can barely move around. By taking my medicine like I am supposed to be, I will not only feel better physically and emotionally, I will also be a lot happier. It is also important for me to take my medicine so we can hopefully have a child one day!
December 12 – Body Integration
This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?
I honestly do not think I have felt like that with my body. I very rarely feel like I am one cohesive me instead of my mind and body. So hopefully in the upcoming year I can answer this but for not, I have not felt that way.
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Dec
11
Posted: 12.11.10 @ 01:48am • Filed: Daily Kate • Tags: #reverb10
Once again I need to catch up on #reverb10 since I have been gone all day at my mom’s house. We needed to do laundry and decided to stay for dinner since momma was making homemade veggie soup. Oh my, it was delicious!
December 10 – Wisdom
What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?
The wisest decision I made this year was to move out. At times I feel like it was the wisest and most idiotic decision since you really never understand the term sink or swim until you are out on your own. Being on my own has been extremely tough and sometimes I want to run back to my mommy with my tail between my legs but I know I can’t do that. Moving out gave me the push to grow up and be independent which I am proud to say I can survive on my own. Of course, I did not move out completely on my own since I obviously live with my husband but this was a lesson we both needed to learn. It also was extremely trying taking care of Grayson without the backup of my mom and sister but we both have thrived being out on our own. I am not the self conscious little girl who hides behind her family anymore. I am okay on my own.
There is one thing I can say about #reverb10, it has given me reason to blog and I am so thankful for that. It is very fun reflecting on my year and reaching out to my readers by sharing my life experiences with them. I am definitely enjoying this!
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Dec
09
Posted: 12.09.10 @ 11:03pm • Filed: Daily Kate • Tags: #reverb10
December 9 – Party
What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans.
The only real party I can think of would definitely have to be our wedding reception. It was full of our family and friends helping us celebrate our marriage. It was kind of funny since when our preacher, Marc, announced us, we walked in and I got all teary eyed as everyone looked at us with such warmth and love in their eyes. We cut our cake, threw my bouquet, and then we walked back out so I could go change. Walking in your wedding dress is definitely not as easy as you would think since I had a long train and that thing was very heavy. At least I was smart enough to choose comfortable shoes since my wedding shoes were actually white, diamond-studded flip flops, lol. We did not really have any music playing per say, but you could hear everyone chattering and giving us their well wishes. The food was amazing as well since our reception was professional catered by A Taste of Soul. We had appetizers, a pasta station, a fruit station, a meat carving station, and then our cookie station along with our cake. Man, oh man, we had so much great food. To this day our family still comments on how great the food was, heh. You know us Southerners, we like to eat!! I can remember there were a lot of pictures taken at the reception as well and then our preacher decided to do the “Thriller” dance which seriously made the night even more memorable! Overall, the party was memorable and amazing. I loved being around my family, his family, and our friends!
In other news, I have one final down and one more to go on Monday! I am exhausted and so ready for this semester to be over. Even though finals do suck, it has been great spending the week with Grayson and my hubby. My sister has also been staying a lot with us since I am her ride to work since she hit a deer. Hubby’s birthday was Tuesday, my step-dad’s birthday is today, and Selena’s birthday is on Saturday so we have a lot to celebrate this week! So until next time, later loves because it is time for me to retire to the couch so I can watch my Thursday night television (Grey’s, Vampire Diaries, Private Practice, Big Bang, & Shit My Dad Says).
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Dec
08
Posted: 12.08.10 @ 11:33pm • Filed: Daily Kate • Tags: #reverb2010
Since I have been lacking in the blogging department lately, I decided to jump on board the whole #reverb2010 bandwagon. I have seen plenty of fellow bloggers posting on their website and I thought this would give me a great chance to reflect on my year since 2010 has been quite an eventful year for me. So here goes without further ado.
December 1 – One Word
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
My one word would definitely be changes because that is what 2010 certainly had in store with me. I got engaged, planned my wedding, got married, met my step-son, fell head over heels for my step-son, moved out of my mom’s house, and had my first major failure in school. 2010 has definitely been a trying year and even though it had plenty of ups an downs, I would not change anything that has happened this year. The failure in school I am talking about is how I have failed the same class twice due to personal issues that have caused me to miss a test. This semester I missed a class due to Grayson’s sickness but in my eyes, Grayson is more important. Next year I hope the word that encompasses 2011 is bittersweet since I am hoping that all of my hard work will pay off by me graduating from college, walking across the stage, and then hopefully getting pregnant!
December 2 – Writing
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?
Considering my blogging is used for my personal expression as well as to make money on the side, there is a lot that can come in the way of it. I have a life filled with a husband, one year old, and a busy school schedule. Honestly, I do not believe there is anything I can do to eliminate things that get in the way of my writing because I enjoy those things too much. I am sure if I cut back on spending time with the family I could spend more time writing, but seriously, family is way more important! My writing is just a hobby and for side cash and that is how I plan on keeping it.
December 3 – Moment
Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).
The moment that comes to mind would be the first time Grayson ever crawled into my arms and gave me a kiss. I can remember we were both sitting on my bed at my mom’s getting ready for bed. We were watching the Goodnight Show on Sprout and he smelled of his lavender baby powder and his soap. My heart melted and I felt so alive. I know that sounds completely insane but to look down at a child and feel their love for you radiating from their body is truly a gift straight from God. Spending time with Grayson has given me the push to do good in school and plan for our future so we can give him brothers and sisters one day. In this moment, I felt so at home and as if I was meant to be in that moment in time. I feel so loved when I am around Grayson and Jonathan because they are the two things that keep me going.
December 4 – Wonder
How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?
Everyday that I watch Grayson I feel a sense of wonder in my life because I love how his eyes light up at the simplest of things. He finds amazement and interest in the most mundane things which makes me look at the world through his eyes more often.
December 5 – Let Go
What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?
The past and it has been a long time coming, I tell ya. I have always focused so much on the past and allowed it into my future and that ended this year. I finally let go of all of the hurt and pain that surrounded the relationship with my father as well. It was time to let bygones be bygones and we have a much better relationship because of that. I also buried the fears and feelings surrounding my rape and have stopped letting it govern how I act today which has allowed me to be free and able to fall fully in love with my husband.
December 6 – Make
What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?
The last thing I made was a cake for my husband’s birthday since I believe every birthday merits a cake. There are some things I really want to make for Christmas with Grayson such as little decorations for the tree and such. I think handmade ornaments and cards mean the most. I plan on making some gifts for my parents with him so they have a keepsake from him that is handmade.
December 7 – Community
Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?
I discovered the online communities of Lavish and Ecstasy this year. Even though I am not very active in them right now, I really enjoyed talking with people my age and getting to know them better. I also became more active in the blogging and twitter community. I have met some great people whom I now follow their blogs which has led me to discover that there are a lot of people who think and feel the same way as I do on certain subjects out there. It is very gratifying to know I am not alone in this big ole’ world. I look forward to joining Veracity in 2011 and hopefully becoming even more active in the whole blogging community as well.
December 8 – Beautifully Different
Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.
There are a lot of things about me that makes me different from others. I am twenty-five years old and have a lot to be thankful in my life. Considering I am thankful for everything in my life and do not focus on the negatives, that sets me apart from a lot of people in the world today. As far as the things that make me physically different from others would be my weight and my eyes. I have no problem admitting my weight issues but I embrace them and plan on changing them. I do not let that get to me and know that there is no reason for me to not hold my head up high and be proud of who I am. I also have pretty and unique eyes per lots of people. If you were to ask my mom she would tell you I have Ukrainian eyes which makes me so proud to know I got those from my grandpa. Another thing I think that makes me beautiful is my resilience since I have overcame so much in my life but I have not let it hold me back. I am determined to make something out of my life and make a difference and come hell or high water I will!
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Dec
08
![[Sex Toy Review] Roulette Croupier](http://mrsjones.nu/wp/wp-content/plugins/ttftitles/cache/00b387f9649409d08a675365ef3e70d9.png){kind=small}
Posted: 12.08.10 @ 01:24am • Filed: Newlyweds • Tags:
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Dec
02
Posted: 12.02.10 @ 07:30pm • Filed: Daily Kate • Tags: exhaustion
Sorry for not blogging recently, I have been completely swamped with school. In other good news, I have been working on the winter theme and will be ready to release it sometime next week! In fact, I only have one more night left of school and then I can take my two finals and be done with this semester. I am so tired of the hustle and bustle of this semester and am quite ready for it all to start winding down which it is. Sorry if this post makes no sense, I am exhausted. In fact, I think I am going to go take a nap before dinner! So until next time, later loves.
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